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Sunday, September 11, 2011
FWD:: Smart Little Girl
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A mother enters her daughter's bedroom and sees a letter on the wall over the bed. With the worst premonition, she reads it, with trembling hands: It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm telling you that I eloped with my new boyfriend. I found real passion and he is so nice, with all his piercings and tattoos and his big motorcycle.
But is not only that Mum, I'm pregnant and John said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that's one of my dreams. I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends, who are providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we may want.
In the meantime, we'll pray for the science to find the AIDS cure, for Ahmed to get better, he deserves it. Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Some day I'll visit for you to know your grandchildren. Your daughter, Judith.
P.S.: Mum, it's not true. I'm at the neighbour's house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in the desk drawer.
But is not only that Mum, I'm pregnant and John said that we will be very happy in his trailer in the woods. He wants to have many more children with me and that's one of my dreams. I've learned that marijuana doesn't hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for us and his friends, who are providing us with all the cocaine and ecstasy we may want.
In the meantime, we'll pray for the science to find the AIDS cure, for Ahmed to get better, he deserves it. Don't worry Mom, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Some day I'll visit for you to know your grandchildren. Your daughter, Judith.
P.S.: Mum, it's not true. I'm at the neighbour's house. I just wanted to show you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in the desk drawer.
FWD:: Very Cold Winter
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It was autumn, and the Red Indians asked their New Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was a Red Indian chief in a modern society, he couldn't tell what the weather was going to be.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his Tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared.
But also being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked 'Is the coming winter going to be cold?'
'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed,' the weather man responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood. A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. 'Is it going to be a very cold winter?'
'Yes,' the man at National Weather Service again replied, 'It's definitely going to be a very cold winter.'
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.
Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again.
'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?' 'Absolutely,' The man replied. 'It's going to be one of the coldest winters ever.'
'How can you be so sure?' the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, 'The Red Indians are collecting wood like crazy.'
This is how stock markets work!
It was autumn, and the Red Indians asked their New Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was a Red Indian chief in a modern society, he couldn't tell what the weather was going to be.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his Tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared.
But also being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked 'Is the coming winter going to be cold?'
'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed,' the weather man responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood. A week later, he called the National Weather Service again. 'Is it going to be a very cold winter?'
'Yes,' the man at National Weather Service again replied, 'It's definitely going to be a very cold winter.'
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.
Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again.
'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?' 'Absolutely,' The man replied. 'It's going to be one of the coldest winters ever.'
'How can you be so sure?' the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, 'The Red Indians are collecting wood like crazy.'
This is how stock markets work!
FWD:: The Gender Test
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The Gender Test!
Are you male or female?
To know the answer, look down...
NOT HERE... MY FRIEND
I SAID LOOK DOWN....
NOT SCROLL DOWN!!
The Gender Test!
Are you male or female?
To know the answer, look down...
NOT HERE... MY FRIEND
I SAID LOOK DOWN....
NOT SCROLL DOWN!!
FWD:: Software production Cycle
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What are the OFFSHORE and
ONSITE Project Managers doing?
What is the CLIENT doing?
What are SOFTWARE PROGRAMMERS doing?
What is the Big Boss doing?
What are the OFFSHORE and
ONSITE Project Managers doing?
What is the CLIENT doing?
What are SOFTWARE PROGRAMMERS doing?
What is the Big Boss doing?
FWD:: Interesting IT Companies And Their Hidden Meanings
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1.NIIT : Not Interested in IT
2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output
3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses
4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions
5. INFOSYS :Inferior Offline Systems
6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping
7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds
8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines
9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly
10. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors
11. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings
12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible
13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort
14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers
15. BFL : Brainwash First and Let them go
16. DELL : Deplorable Equipment & lackluster
17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.
18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India
2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output
3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses
4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions
5. INFOSYS :Inferior Offline Systems
6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping
7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds
8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines
9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly
10. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors
11. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings
12. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible
13. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort
14. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers
15. BFL : Brainwash First and Let them go
16. DELL : Deplorable Equipment & lackluster
17. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.
18. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India
FWD:: Husbands Are innocent
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Where is the money?
.
.
.
Show me your Pockets
.
.
.
I'll not give her the money, She spends all of my salary Booohoooo!
.
.
.
Give me way... I am going for shopping.
.
.
.
Thanks Sweetheart...........bye :)
Where is the money?
.
.
.
Show me your Pockets
.
.
.
I'll not give her the money, She spends all of my salary Booohoooo!
.
.
.
Give me way... I am going for shopping.
.
.
.
Thanks Sweetheart...........bye :)
FWD:: 7 True Facts About Girlfriends
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3. Although They Always BuyExpensive Clothes, According to them, they Never Have Anything Good To Wear ! (For that too BF is held responsible)
4. Although They Never Have Nothing Good To Wear They Always Dress Beautifully !
5. Although They Always Dress Beautifully, They Are Never Satisfied !
6. Although They Are Never Satisfied, They Always Expect their BF To Compliment Them !
7. Although They Expect BF To Compliment Them, When They Do They Don't Believe Them ...
1. Most Important Thing For
a GF Is FINANCIAL SECURITY !
2. Although This Is Important,
They Still Go Out & Buy Expensive Clothes(And that too from their bf's budget)
a GF Is FINANCIAL SECURITY !
2. Although This Is Important,
They Still Go Out & Buy Expensive Clothes(And that too from their bf's budget)
3. Although They Always BuyExpensive Clothes, According to them, they Never Have Anything Good To Wear ! (For that too BF is held responsible)
4. Although They Never Have Nothing Good To Wear They Always Dress Beautifully !
5. Although They Always Dress Beautifully, They Are Never Satisfied !
6. Although They Are Never Satisfied, They Always Expect their BF To Compliment Them !
7. Although They Expect BF To Compliment Them, When They Do They Don't Believe Them ...
FWD: Yoga and Alcohol give the same benefits....
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Savasana
Position of total relaxation.
Position of total relaxation.
YOGA
Balasana
Position that brings the sensation of peace and calm.
Setu Bandha Sarvangasana
This position calms the brain and heals tired legs.
Marjayasana
Position stimulates the midriff area and the spinal column.
Halasana
Excellent for back pain and insomnia.
Dolphin
Excellent for the shoulder area, thorax, legs, and arms.
Salambhasana
Great exercise to stimulate the lumbar area, legs, and arms.
Ananda Balasana
This position is great for massaging the hip area.
Malasana
This position, for ankles and back muscles.
FWD:: Who Said Girls Want Big...
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We Know, Every guy wishes that those were brains... Don't You???
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